Old Flame

I want to wish you a very, very Happy Birthday. I hope you have a GREAT time this weekend. I would like to take you to lunch for your Bday - please let me know when you might be available. Let's do some margaritas. Take care and once again - have a great weekend. Let's see, hmmmmm, this looks like a sweet email, doesn't it? In fact, it is. It comes from one with whom I had a fling back in 1986. His sister recently told him I was divorced and he called me up. Right away. On the phone on my desk in the classroom. He wanted to take me out for lunch to congratulate me on my retirement. We met at a little Mexican place near my house. He lives way out in the West Valley almost an hour away from here. He comes over to this area a lot, he says, on business and to see family. He lives in a big house, belongs to a country club where he plays lots and lots of tennis and golf. He also has a big wife. Big wife. At the end of our very friendly lunch, he mentioned that his marriage is not going well, that they talk of getting a divorce, they just don't get along anymore. I knew this was coming. He had been quite the playboy back in the day. He knew how to move fast. I think he is largely out of practice but I do think he was trying to feel me out to see if I would perk up when he told me his marriage isn't going well. But, no, thank you, I won't be participating. He isn't a man I would have another affair with, even if he were single. I could go out with him because I enjoy his company but I could never be intimate with him again, and he would fully expect me to go to bed with him. So I must find a nice but clear way to respond to his email telling him I am uncomfortable going out with him because he is married. I don't know how to do that, and it's been a week since I got his email.